Thinking Too Much About Pinafore

My wife and I recently went to a production of Gilbert and Sullivan’s HMS Pinafore. It was perfectly professional, well-sung, and very enjoyable. However, I began, on the drive home, to think too much about it.

At the end of Gilbert and Sullivan’s HMS Pinafore, the social complexities of class and station are resolved through the revelation by Buttercup that had earlier cared for two babies, one “of low condition”, the other “a regular patrician”. The correction of this mix-up leads to the reversal of position between Ralph and Captain Corcoran, and paves the way for the union of Ralph, formally a “low tar”, but now Captain, and the former Captain’s daughter, Josephine. Buttercup now is able in her position to marry the former Captain, and Sir Joseph, the First Lord of Admiralty, his cousin, Hebe. The opera ends with general rejoicing, and with the presumed marriages, as befits a comedy, of all.

If Ralph and Captain Corcoran were switched as babies, then they must be roughly the same age. Which means that Ralph is old enough to be Josephine’s father. And that Buttercup is old enough to be Corcoran’s mother, indeed more or less was his mother early on. And that the general commingling of nuptials between individuals of such different ages must certainly be as, if not more, shocking than the class differences that this reversal resolved. The Oedipal overtones are obvious.

Furthermore: Sir Joseph himself has been up to this point been surrounded by a virtual harem of “his sisters and his cousins,/whom he reckons up by dozens,/and his aunts”. It is after all Hebe who claims “Then good-bye to your sisters,/and your cousins, and your aunts./Especially your cousins”, not Sir Joseph. He own promises to be “true to the devotion that my love implies”, but his love heretofore has been a devotion to the whole of that harem, not welcome circumstance, one assumes, for Hebe.

So while Pinafore is not subverting social classes and divisions, however humorously it may make fun of these relationships in a light-hearted way, it is perhaps posing and affirming new sexual relationship modalities, especially within the English. Remember that Ralph, and through Ralph by implication all other participants, “in spite of all temptations,/To belong to other nations,/He remains an Englishman.” The combination of national identity politics with affirmation of the politics of social class evident in the repeat of the “He is an Englishman” (spoken of Sir Joseph) chorus that ends the opera.

So Pinafore is suggesting that the English do have sexual relations (off-stage) that we might find surprising while affirming the supremacy of Englishness at the end.

Which is why we generally don’t think too much about Pinafore.

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Hard Work

Writing a poem – that’s hard work.
The dactyl is tricky, hard the iamb.
The line has its rhythms and quirks,

The stanza demands its pound. I am
Seated quiet at my desk. The line does test
The mind. The line in turn reveals its jam

Of vociferous enjambment and at best
The line passes through to the next
And gives the craft no rest.

Reading a poem – it’s not text.
An atom of thought that’s distilled,
Willed into being and the reader, vexed,

Completes the line, the thought, and thrilled
Reading appears to be unwilled,
A joint poetic act fulfilled.

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Jim’s Ketchup

3 lbs. Roma tomatoes
2 cups apple cider vinegar
4 tsp. kosher salt
1 tsp. ground white pepper
1 cup dark brown sugar
1 tsp. Worcester sauce
1 white onion, peeled, but kept whole

  1. Peel, seed, and chop tomatoes.
  2. Put all ingredients except Worcester sauce together in an 2 quart pot,  bring to simmer then simmer for 30-40 minutes.
  3. Remove from heat and remove onion. Let cool for about 30 minutes.
  4. Put into the most powerful blender you own, and blend on high for about one minute, adding a little apple cider vinegar if too thick. Add Worcester sauce to blender and pulse to blend.

Bottle and store in fridge, or can using hot bath method for longer storage. Yield: about 3-4 cups per batch.

Will give Heinz a run for its money.

Variations

You may vary the taste by adjusting/adding seasonings, however, adjustments may cause a change in the color.

Here’s a Southeast Asian variation:

To the basic recipe:

Add 2 – 4 red Thai Chiles
Add 2 additional TB brown sugar for each addition of 4 chiles
Substitute rice vinegar for apple cider vinegar
Substitute 2 TB fish sauce for Worcester sauce

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My Cat

(Apologies to Christian Morgenstern)

My cat sits on the mat. That’s where he’s at.
Yet why does he do that?
He could be on the sill, but still, he’s on the mat.

So why he just does that?
A refined creature, he, and just this time,
He did it for the sake of this rhyme.

My Cat, On The Mat

My Cat, On The Mat

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Knitted Sock

Knitted Sock: A Recipe

Ingredients:

1 500g ball or 2 250g sock yarn of choice
2 2.5 mm 24” cable needles
Row counter
Darning Needle

Prerequisites:

Long tail cast-on
Knitting in the round
Picking up stitches
Kitchener stitch
Weaving in

Abbreviations:

k – Knit
p – perl
ssk – slip knitwise, slip knitwise, knit
k2tog – knit two stitches together
p2tog – perl two stiches together
sl – slip stitch from the left needle to the right needle perlwise
* * – repeat stitches between the * *

Two sizes (m/l)

Instructions

Cast On:

  1. Cast on (56/64) stitches using a long-tail cast-on
  2. Divide stitches (28/32) between the two needles
  3. Knit first round, joining and being careful not to twist stitches

The Concept:

When you knit socks on two circular needles, the stitches on one needle represent the front of the sock, and the stitches on the other needle the back of the sock. You will ALWAYS only be working on one needle, either the front needle or the back, with the other needle hanging loose. To facilitate this, you may choose to differentiate the needles by color or type (e.g., one metal, one bamboo).

Ribbing:

  1. At start of second round, *k,p2,k* to end of first needle. Repeat on second needle to complete second round
  2. Repeat step 1 until 18 rounds have been completed

Sock Body:

  1. Beginning with round 19, knit from front to end of round
  2. Continue knitting in the round until round 78

Heel Flap:

  1. Knit front side (first needle) of round 79
  2. Reset row counter to 1
  3. On second needle, *sl,k* to end of needle
  4. Turn second needle so that the wrong side of the sock is facing
  5. Slip first stitch then p* to end of needle
  6. Repeat steps two through 4 until 24 additional rounds have been knit

Heel Turn:

  1. K18, k2tog, k, then turn to wrong side (you will not be at the end of the row)
  2. Slip the stitch so that the stitch and yarn are now on the right needle
  3. P5, p2tog, p, then turn to right side (you will not be at the end of the row)
  4. Slip the stitch so that the stitch and yarn are now on the right needle
  5. Knit until you come to the stich BEFORE the gap
  6. K2tog, k, then turn again to wrong side
  7. Slip the stitch so that the stitch and yarn are now on the right needle
  8. Perl until you come to the stitch BEFORE the gap
  9. P2tog, p, then turn to the right side
  10. Repeat steps 3 through 9 until you have finished the right side with a k2tog and the wrong side with a p2tog
  11. You will now have 14/18 stitches on the back needle

Sock Gusset:

  1. Knit across the heel flap
  2. Pick up and knit 14 stitches down the left side of the heel flap, completing row 79
  3. Knit yarn from heel flap back to the front, starting row 80
  4. At the end of the row, pick up and knit 14 stitches from the right side of the heel flap and then continuing knitting across the entire back section which will now have 42/48 stitches
  5. At round 81, knit across the front needle. On the back needle, k, k2tog then knit across to the last three stitches, then ssk, k. You have decreased two stitches, one at the beginning of the round and one at the end
  6. Round 82, K
  7. Repeat decrease round (step 5) on rounds 83, 85, 89, 91, 93, with straight knitting on even rounds 84, 86, 88, 90, 92
  8. At the end of the gusset decrease, the back needle will now have as many stitches as the front, i.e., 28/32

Sock Foot:

  1. Knit from round 92 to 125/135.
  2. At this point, try on sock to determine length. You should be about 1” from the beginning of the big toe. If so, continue knitting until you reach this point, at round 135/145. If not, continue knitting.

Toe Decreases:

  1. At round 135/145 (or wherever you are) begin toe decrease by k, k2tog, knit to last three stitches, then ssk, k on the front needle, then repeat on the back needle
  2. Knit next round
  3. Repeat steps 1 and 2 until you have 14/16 stitches on both needles
  4. Repeat step 1 now each round on each needle until you have 6 stitches on each needle

Finishing:

  1. Break yarn, leaving about 18”. Using Kitchener stitch, bind together last front and back stitches.
  2. Turn sock inside out, and weave in yarn at toe and sock start.

Repeat for second sock. Unless you want to walk around with one sock on, none sock off.

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Pills

I do them. A lot of them.

Statins for my cholesterol. Beta-blockers for my blood pressure. Pradaxa to thin my blood and make me bruise. A water pill because you can never void too much. A potassium pill because you can void too much. A pill to help my heart maintain a healthy beat and not go tango’ing off on its own.

And that pill for my heart? A replacement for the previous pill that wanted to put me into congestive heart failure (you know you’re on a slippery slope when the published side-effects of the pill you’re taking are exactly the same as the symptoms it’s supposed to cure).

And that beta-blocker? Now two pills instead of one. When I first took this pill, I told my doctor: “The last time I took a pill that made me feel this way, I was in college and they were illegal”. He didn’t even smile. You know the joke: I used to care, but now I take a pill for that. This is the pill.

And that heart pill? It can cause liver and kidney damage (as can the statin), so more than three months on that pill isn’t advised. We may be tango’ing again.

I am a walking, talking experiment in the interaction of a variety of pills. I should be part of a medical trial. Actually, I AM part of a medical trial, it’s just that no one’s tracking me. Nor anyone else who takes what I take and we are legion, my pill regime being relatively common.

A pill to make me happy? No, but I now understand that there probably IS a pill that would make me if not happy, then insensate to the things that bother. So the “I” that I am is the I that takes pills and whose environment as perceived is shaped in part by the taking of them.

Pills.

I do them. A lot of them. Am I better? The numbers would say so.

So now I am calm, sleep well, am less bothered by the things around me that used to bother me. I record the numbers every day. Every day, a number, every day another five pills.

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Haiku

No snow on ceders.
Not here. Not now. Tomorrow:
Winter’s fresh embrace.

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Instead of a Manhattan

3 oz Maker’s Mark bourbon
1.5 oz Noilly Prat Vermouth
.5 oz Grand Marnier
2 dashes Paychaud bitters
2 dashes Angostura bitters

Mix in a shaker with abundant ice and serve up in a chilled Martini glass. Omitting the Paychaud bitters is not an option.

Instead of a Manhattan

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